Best Network Meeting In Years

It's not rocket science...

Yesterday 10 youthworkers from our community connected to pray.  Catholic, Baptist, non- denominational and para-church, we were all in the room together.

As an added bonus one of our local high school principles joined us at the beginning of the time to share some info about his particular school.  Of course we were able to pray God's blessing on him.

We read Psalms of praise...
We shared personal needs and prayed for one another...
We prayed for kids and parents in our area...

And WE did it TOGETHER...

I'm so thankful for each who was in the room.

Take the time, energy and risk to connect with other youthworkers in your area.  It will make a difference.

"that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me."

                                                                                    Jesus

Who's The Real Youth Pastor?

I have this dream.  

I dream our small group leaders would see themselves as youth pastors.  I've also hoped that students and parents would see their small group leaders as their primary pastor. 

For far too long our churches have leaned too heavily on the "professional pastor".  At the end of the day it's not about the paid youth worker but the host of volunteers God uses.

So what do "paid" youth workers do???

"Equip God's people for works of service"

So, when I saw his fb post from one of our key volunteer leaders a little tear welled up in my eye...

"Getting ready to launch into a crazy week for work -- Detroit area (via ORD) early, and San Antonio later in the week. But what is really on my mind this morning are students at IBC. First day back at school for most. I'm excited for the newly minted Junior class, and thoughtful how we can grow together this year. Praying for them and for the host of teachers and administrators that also are back into life investment this week!"

This is what relational ministry is all about!  Leaders focused on and praying for the kids God has placed on their heart.  It's amazing to see who God raises up to pastor kids.  

Brian is a long time leader and serves sacrificially.  God has and will continue to use him to love and disciple kids.

I'm so blessed to be a part.

Next Gen - Do You Have Common Language?

In a church ministry context it's always a challenge to create and implement consistency across children, student and young adult ministries.  We're trying to figure it out.  

Last Saturday ALL our next gen volunteers gathered for a time of training, encouragement and inspiration.  In our ministry context next gen includes...

children's ministry, 
middle school ministry, 
high school ministry, 
college ministry, 
young adult ministry and
parenting ministry.

Training All Next Gen Leaders Together?

What!?!  

Student Ministry and Children's Ministry actually working together?  That's kind of like the lion and the lamb hanging together.

Not just student ministry and children's ministry, this Saturday all of the leaders from children's, student, college and young adult's ministries are joining together for a day of training.

Of course there is a huge difference between a volunteer who rocks a baby and a volunteer who leads a small group of emerging adults.  Of course we'll have appropriate training for specific age groups but we're super excited to have all our next gen leaders in the same room.

Here are 3 reasons we're so excited...

1)  We want each leader to know that they're a part of a BIGGER story.

Fall - The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

Yes, fall is my favorite time of the year. College football, cooling temperatures and the changing colors are all things that make me feel like a small boy on Christmas morning. I love fall.

I feel the same way about student ministry. It's one of the busiest times of the year but it's one of my favorites. From reconnecting with adult leaders to thinking about students reconnecting with friends at school. The fall season is the March Madness or Tour de France of student ministry. (Ok, for all you soccer peeps the World Cup)

As I'm thinking about all we've done to prepare and all we will continue to do, here are some broad stroke meanderings about student ministry in fall.

Adult Leaders Get the Spotlight

Noon Prayer

One of my favorite parts of noon prayer...

A Prayer attributed to St. Francis

Lord, make us instruments of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let us sow love;
    where there is injury, pardon;
    where there is discord, union;
    where there is doubt, faith;
    where there is despair, hope;
    where there is darkness, light;
    where there is sadness, joy.
Grant that we may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
    to be understood as to understand;
    to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
    it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
    and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen.

Short Term Mission Trip - A Horrible Thing to Waste

Do you take students on short-term mission trips?  

If you do, you know the incredible work that happens in the hearts of students and also in the hearts of those receiving ministry.  Kids can make a huge impact across the street and around the world.

I just got home from an international mission trip with our students so this is very fresh.  Here are some important questions I'm trying to answer in my own heart...

How do we maximize and inject discipleship into our short term mission strategy?

How do our trips fit into the rest of our ministry strategy?

How do we help students see and trust Jesus more through our short trips?

How do we use our mission trips to teach kids theology?

A short-term mission trip is a horrible thing to waste.

Some quick and very random thoughts...

Should I Tell The Parents? - 4 Thoughts To Consider

It's a tough question isn't it?  

If your ministry is going well it's good and natural for students to trust the adults around them.  As trust is developed sometimes they'll share struggles and failures with a small group leader or a pastor that they might not share with their parents.

So what do we do with that information?  

Should we tell their parents EVERYTHING?

Do we tell parents NOTHING?

Last week some smart people chimed in with some thoughts and ideas worth considering.

Should You Tell The Parents?

As I've listened to their wisdom here's some thoughts I've been considering when faced with the question, "when should we include parents?"

Some situations are black and white

Should You Tell The Parents?

I had a discussion with a volunteer small group leader that I have often in student ministry.  It went something like this.

"Susie (generic girl name) says she no longer believes in God, should I talk to her parents?"

Other questions that come up are, "he tried cigarettes, should I tell his parents?" or "she's dating THAT guy, should I talk to her parents?" or "he said a bad word..."

You get the idea.  

As we seek to disciple students and partner with parents when do we bring parents into these kinds of conversations?  Our small groups are governed by principles of confidentiality but as you know that doesn't mean you never share what's going on in a kids life.

So, here's the question...

When do you bring parents into the loop as it relates to "confidential" conversations with kids?

I have some ideas but wanted to hear what ya'll (I'm in Texas) have to say first.

Let's learn from one another...

Is Your Summer Camp Cheesy?

I’ve had the privilege of doing a lot of Summer Camp this year and currently I'm in Gulf Shores at my church's high school camp.

To be really honest with you, I think camp is kind of cheesy.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love camp and believe God uses those experiences all over the country to move students towards his heart and I actually enjoy the cheesiness. As I’m staring down the barrel of our camp this weekend here are some things I’m thinking about to embrace the cheese but more importantly position our students where they’ll rub up against Jesus.

Camp should reflect your overall student ministry strategy

In other words, if you’re a ministry driven by adult leaders and small groups, your camp should have those opportunities. If your ministry is highly missional in nature, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to provide some missional experience at camp or at least expose students to injustices in the world. If your ministry is all about production then do that to the max. In fact, it might be better to go to Big Stuff or something that does production at the highest level.

The point is this, your camp should reflect what your priorities are in your ministry. Summer camp isn’t a stand-alone event, it’s connected to the rest of your ministry.

Work hard at having fun

To be honest this is a tough one for me. Fun is a high priority for my ministry, it just can’t be dependent on me to pull it off. This weekend one of our key leaders is the mc. She is absolutely hilarious and extremely fun. If you’re a fuddy dudd like me find someone who is fun and put them in charge.

Camp isn't a destination, it’s a doorway

You know this already, the challenge with camp is helping students process and live out what God does at camp when they get home. What about taking the entire last session or 2 to help students process and imagine what God is going to do when they get home? Many times camp builds towards that “last night” experience. Why not have that experience earlier in the week to help students unpack what God is teaching them and helping them prepare to go home?

If our camp is just about camp and not life change where students live work and play we have missed an incredible opportunity. 

Focus on the gospel not the experience

Students (and adults) can easily be lured into worshipping an experience instead of God. The story of what Jesus has done on our behalf must be the centerpiece of every camp no matter what the theme. 

Jesus doesn’t only live at your camp location. If students come home embracing the gospel and all that means in their life then their walk with him will have been truly deepened.

So, embrace the cheese and enjoy how God seems to work in a special way at our summer camps. By the way, I met Jesus at our church’s summer camp in Jekyll Island, Georgia. It will be cool to hear stories over the years of how God has worked at your camp this summer.

3 Quick Camp Thoughts - Sweat the Details AND Get Out of the Weeds

We're right in the middle of final preparations for Beach Camp 2013.

When you're responsible to get over 200 people 12 hours away there are tons of administrative details.

Busses, vans, food, production, adult leaders, communicating to parents, rules, speakers, bands, budgets, schedules, booklets, rooming assignments...

As you know this list is just the beginning.

To pull off an effective camp you have to take care of the details.  Let's be honest, youth pastors / workers are not usually known for their administrative effectiveness.  It's very important we make sure all the details are accomplished.  Let me say it again, SWEAT THE DETAILS.

However, I've found that as we get closer to camp it's easy to get stuck in the weeds.  Here's what I mean.  Sometimes you get so overwhelmed with the details you just focus on the WHAT for the trip, not the WHY.

What about some balance?  

Here are some thoughts our team has been considering as we try to balance the vision of camp with the details of camp.

Camp is about God changing individual lives...

As we've looked over the lists of kids who have signed up we are constantly brainstorming who isn't on the list and why.  We even grab last years sign up list to compare.  If we haven't heard from a kid in a while it gives a great excuse to reach out and invite them to attend.  The response has been incredible.

At the end of the day it isn't about the total number of kids at camp but each individual student and the potential of God's gospel work in their lives.  We want them at camp because we believe there's something significant about taking a few days away to connect with God and one another.

Camp is about adult / student relationships...

The student ministry philosophy where I serve is built on Godly adult leaders investing in the lives of kids.  Our camp reflects this philosophy.  As important as getting kids there getting the right adults is crucial.  

We've also found that having key leaders at camp gives them great momentum in going into their fall small group ministry.  Is there a better place to deepen relationships than camp?

Camp is about God...

These few days in Gulf Shores are a part of the tremendous story God is telling.  As our camp story reflects and contributes to God's story he is the one who receives the glory He is due.  It's not about a person, church or even an experience.  It's truly about God doing his transformative work in and through us.

It's important to get our heads above the clouds to remember what happens at camp echoes in eternity.

So, we need to make sure we take care of all the details.  Communicate well and take time to work on administration but don't forget the why of camp.  

Remind yourself and others about the tremendous potential that's sitting right before you.  Don't miss the forest because of all the trees.

Should I Wear A Speedo? - Beach Camp Modesty

Recently there's been a lot of conversation around the web concerning swimwear, particularly girl's swimwear.

Here's what people are asking...

What is modesty?
Is a girl responsible for a guy lusting?
What about girls lusting?
Who gets to decide what is modest dress and what isn't?
Should I wear a speedo?

The purpose of this post isn't to argue the specifics of Biblical modesty or make a judgement about swimwear, it's simply to share where our student ministry team has landed on our bathing suit policy.

There's no doubt scripture teaches us we should present ourselves in a way that's modest.  We should praise those who want to be modest and encourage those who aren't but how does modesty relate to what we wear and who gets to decide?

For example, a couple weeks ago I was in Amish country in Pennsylvania.  Their view would be way different from Christians who grew up in south Florida.  How do we find a balance that honors God?

Youth groups all over the country head to the coast for summer camp and have to make decisions about their bathing suite rules. So as youthworkers how do we make decisions that are founded on grace and truth?  How we address the bathing suite issue is important because it teaches our guys and girls about Biblical modesty which goes much deeper than the question of a one piece or two piece at camp.

At my home church we're about to send out the packing list for our beach camp.  This is where we've landed for this year's camp and yes, it could change next year.

A word about your bathing suit…

Ok, it’s time to pack for camp!

As you’re thinking about your 2013 beach wear options I want to share some thoughts.

Modesty is a very subjective thing.  You could ask 10 different people if an outfit or bathing suite is modest and you may get 10 different responses.

We ask you to do your best choosing bathing suite options that are modest.  For example, girls, please no string bikinis and please make sure you have straps on top.  Guys, please make sure your trunks don’t sag and no Speedos.  :)

It may be a good idea to wear your swimsuits in front of your moms and dads for their opinion.

At the end of the day if our staff feels your swimsuit (guys or girls) is not appropriate for beach camp we’ll ask you to change or wear a shirt.

And remember; if you’re not laying out or swimming please wear a cover up.

This isn’t about a one piece or two piece (I’ve seen one pieces far more revealing than two pieces) but about a desire for each of you to present yourselves appropriate to one another.

Thank you so much for hearing our heart on this!  We’re looking forward to an incredible time.

Yes, it would probably be easier to say "no two pieces" or to simply stay away from swimwear all together (go to the mountains).  We decided to embrace the messiness and have conversations with kids if the need arises.  If someone wears a swimsuit (or anything else for that matter) that is inappropriate we want to talk to them about WHAT they're wearing but also WHY they're wearing it.  The WHY questions is what gets to the heart of Biblical modesty.

By the way, this isn't a condemnation on those who have stricter rules, we could be wrong about this.  In fact, I would love to hear push back and advice.  

What do you think about our swimwear "policy"?  How is yours different?

We're all ears.

Oh, and just to ease your mind, I'm leaving my speedo at home this summer.  Next year?  We'll see.


To learn more about what's being said about modesty check out these websites.

The Evolution of the Swimsuit

Modesty - It's Not What You Think

Is Itsy-Bitsy Wrong?

Just Wondering - How Are We Building Church?

I'm just wondering...

What if churches in America were built ONLY on connecting people to Jesus, each other and mission?

This isn't a commentary on any church or pastor (especially my home church) BUT it seems that the "famous" churches or the churches we praise as being successful in America are built around "famous" and gifted leaders.

Maybe if I were one of those leaders I would feel different, but it seems the body of Christ would be stronger and more effective in it's mission if there was less talk about it's church leaders and more talk about it's Head.

Just wondering...

??

4 Reasons this Dad / Pastor is Thankful for our Student Ministry

 

Over the past few days I've been overwhelmed by the influence student ministry has had on my family.  It's good to stop and reflect.

It's been quite a week.  My 2 oldest sons drove from Georgia to be with the family for my daughter's high school graduation.  Andrew, Austin, Zach and Lauren were all in Dallas as were my in-laws and parents.  What an amazing time.

As a youth pastor my goal has never been to develop relationship with every kid in the youth group, that would be impossible and ineffective.  My deep desire has been to insure every kid has opportunity for meaningful relationship with adults who love Jesus and love them.  

As a father I'm thankful this is the heart of our student ministry.

You see, over the last days I've been reminded of the Godly adults who have shared life with my daughter.  Of course her brothers and grandparents have been there, but then there's Shelly, Brian, Lori, Scott, Alisha, Nat, Dana, Sasha, Mary Ann, Chris, Chelsea, Sylvia, Bryan, Allison, Steve, Jackie, Andrea, Mark, Jade, Javi, Jenn, Susan, Carrie and so many more.  

Some of these relationships have come organically through my friendships but others have come through our student ministry's intentional desire to connect Godly adults with kids.  It seems this is the way the body of Christ is supposed to function.

As I've been reflecting here are areas I'm particularly thankful for...

A safe place for Godly council - 

As a dad I don't know everything nor do I need to know everything going on in the life of my daughter.  I'm so thankful for a safe place for Lauren to share her struggles with Godly adults who love her.  Within these relationships she can doubt, cry, complain and struggle.  I TRUST THEM to provide great Godly wisdom.

A voice of reinforcement -

Obviously I'm not privy to conversations with my daughter and her adult leaders, however, I do know them well enough to know they point her to Biblical truth and wisdom.  You know how it is, as a parent your kids think you no nothing, but when someone else speaks truth it all of a sudden makes sense.  We've needed that over the years.

A foundation of prayer - 

I pray for my kids with frequency and fervency but what an incredible blessing to know other adults who are doing the same.  God has answered those prayers and it makes a difference.

Consistent accountability - 

All of us need to be pursued when we lose our way.  I'm in accountability and need my fanny kicked every once in a while.  (ok, maybe often)  It's so comforting to know you're not the only adult saying hard things to your kids.  God has used these conversations to protect my daughter.

Lauren has had and continues to have a constellation of adults speak into her life.  Some of those adults have influenced a little from a distance and others are close with deep ongoing relationship.  Whether a little or a lot, I'm so thankful for each of those encouraging voices.

If you're a parent, help your kids develop deep relationship with other Godly adults.  Take full advantage of your student ministry's small groups.  Trust that God is in the middle of those relationships.

If you're a youth pastor, work to make sure every student has opportunity for connection with trained / Godly adult leaders.  You can't and shouldn't try to disciple every student in your youth group.  But you should seek to see every student discipled.

If you're a youth pastor and a parent?  Rejoice in the truth that God has designed the Body to function this way.  It truly does take a village.

Come As You Are

Sometimes I feel I need to "fix myself" before I can go to God.

Came across this amazing quote from Spurgeon today.  

Let it sink in and enjoy.  Jesus always accepts the one who will come to Him.

"This man receiveth sinners," but He repulses none.  We come to Him in weakness and sin, with trembling faith, and small knowledge, and slender hope; but He does not cast us out.  We come by prayer, and that prayer broken;  with confession, and that confession faulty; with praise, and that praise far short of His merits; but yet He receives us.  We come diseased, polluted, worn out, and worthless; but He doth in no wise cast us out.  Let us come again today to Him who never casts us out.

Thank you God that we come to you as we are.