I was just thinking about how my life is so different than how Jesus describes a person who follows him. He says if anyone is going to follow him he must deny himself. I'm not very good at denying myself, in fact, if I'm really honest I do a lot better at indulging myself.
Sure, there are things I would do and experience if not for my relationship with Jesus but typically my thought process is about what makes me happy and comfortable. I think about how I can get people to like me more and how I might impress them. The problem is that there is very little about me that's impressive, so it's hard work getting people's attention.
Here's what's ironic. The true way to fulfillment is through denial. Indulgence in anything except Jesus results in always wanting more. It's an empty feeling that can never be filled. Now, denying ourselves and indulging in Jesus is what satisfies us and leaves us thirsty for more of Jesus.. at the same time. It honors him when we drink and drink and drink of him.
So, today I'm asking God to give me the grace to deny myself, take up my cross and follow him. There is silly saying I hate but maybe it's true. Jesus / Others / You. I can't believe I just said that but today I'm going to think about it.
Have a great day of denial and indulgence!